Friday, 13 February 2026

Resilience vs friction

Part 1
A park bench surrounded by lawns and trees
    I'm doing an online course on coping with stress, and there's a section on resilience.

    For the purposes of doing a sort of a review*, the course has this to say about resilience:

    "Resilience is the capacity to face, overcome, and even be strengthened by difficult experiences. It doesn’t mean being immune to stress, sadness or suffering. It is about coping, recovering, and finding a way to grow and develop positively despite the problems we encounter.

    Everyone has some degree of resilience. To recognise this, we only have to think back to all we’ve been through in our lives and remember the times when we felt overwhelmed by the struggle to keep going"

    Speaking as someone who's currently going through a whole heap of suffering, problems and tough times right now, this triggered a different thought in me.

    It made me think of friction, and how this force can erode even the toughest structures over time.

    The related image in my mind was of a staircase.  And how each step descends further and further.  My current experience is that life has been wearing me down -or forcing me down the stairs, several at time- for some while, now.

    I've been trying to resist the effects of friction, or to strive to linger on a half-way step as best I can.  But the effort is both exhausting and pretty futile.

    This may sound pessimistic on the face of it.  But it led on to another, more inspiring train of thought.

    If we want to come back from problems and tough times stronger -or, in other words, to aim for post-traumatic growth- then we need to find a way to counteract the effects of friction.

    We can't realistically expect to stop it.  There's always going to be something in life that pushes us down.  So perhaps the answer is reclamation.

    Weather the storm -by whatever means necessary- and then make plans to rebuild.

    Recognize that erosion -of energy levels, of confidence, even of sense of self perhaps- has taken place -- and that now it's time to invest in yourself.

    'Contract out' if necessary -- in fact I'd suggest that's a sensible approach.  Let friends and loved ones help you with landscaping your new environment.  Or -when ready- seek out some new experiences and make new acquaintances. 

    No-one is an island, but you could draw up plans to become a lovely park.

    Just like climbing a staircase, it's going to take a bit of time and some effort.  And it won't necessarily prevent future erosion.  But there's no sense waiting around in a depleted state for life's next challenge. You don't want to risk that challenge coming before your resilience-o-meter has had chance to refill.

    Doing something constructive could provide just the sense of accomplishment you need.  And what's more it will counteract feelings of helplessness.

    I'm not gong to say reinvent yourself.  But do prioritize yourself.  Take the time to walk in the park -- literally and figuratively.


[*See part 2 of this blog for the review of the course.]


Cookies/data

European Union laws require that EU visitors be given information about cookies used and data collected on this blog.  Google/Blogger have added a notice on this blog to explain Google's use of certain Blogger and Google cookies, including use of Google Analytics and AdSense cookies, and other data collected by Google.  If this notice does not display and you are in the EU, please will you notify me in the comments section.  Many thanks.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Resilience vs friction

Part 1      I'm doing an online course on coping with stress, and there's a section on resilience.      For the purposes of doing a ...