Seek first to understand...

    Just a somewhat brief post about an incident which occurred on the street today.

    An older man had -it appeared- fallen and was laid on the path beside the road.  My friend and I were on out way to get coffee and passed by him.
    We asked the man if he was okay and when he said yes, & that he was sure, we were about to proceed on our way.  But it didn't sit right with us, so we hesitated.  No-one lays on the path beside a busy road in the traffic fumes if all is well.
    Another group of people also stopped to ask the man if he was alright, and if he wanted a tea or a water.  He declined their help.  We all hung on for a few minutes, encouraging him to accept help to sit up, at least, because he looked really uncomfortable.  He said he wanted to sit up by himself, though.

    The other group noted the man had a gash on one of his cheekbones.  He wasn't very coherent when asked what had happened, and his speech was indistinct so it was difficult to communicate effectively, but he seemed to say he didn't want an ambulance summoned.
    The other group went on their way, but my friend and I hesitated, because it occurred to us how vulnerable the man was.  He had retrieved his mobile phone (an old model, not worth anything, but still...) from his pocket and had it in his hand.  The area is not an awesome one in terms of rates of violent crime.  And you hear stories about people perpetrating violence on the vulnerable, such as houseless people.

    What struck me was that -while my friend and the other group of folk stood pondering what to do for the man- numerous other people commented to us as they passed by.  They said: "he's often around" (presumably implying that he's unemployed) and they also said: "he drinks" or "he uses".  Their tone of voice was disparaging.

    Why did these points of 'information' (whether true or not) mean that this man wasn't worthy of having emergency aid summoned for him?  Even if he was under the influence of something and had fallen because of it, did that mean he shouldn't get checked over by a paramedic for a concussion?
    Would it have been okay if he did have a concussion perceived as 'self-inflicted' and we all left him there to deteriorate, or for someone else to steal whatever cash he might've had?
    Alternatively, isn't it possible that someone had hit him in the face sometime prior to our arrival?

    So, my friend and I called an ambulance anyway, and then went to get our coffee at the nearest place so we could see when the crew arrived.
    Meantime, the man had actually got himself into a sitting position, put his cap back on his head and then managed to get to his feet.  He lit a cigarette, and slowly made his way up the road.
    As he passed we asked if he was feeling better and he said (still somewhat indistinctly) that he's diabetic, and he was on his way home now.  We asked if he thought he'd be okay and when he confirmed, we called to get the ambulance stood down.
    Maybe he was only claiming to be diabetic to cover for a substance abuse issue.  Or maybe it's both things.  But it really doesn't matter, you still just don't leave someone who's clearly injured themselves on the street without assistance.  Whether they're unemployed or not.  Whether they're houseless or not.

    I'm not perfect, and I do admit to a bit of trepidation when approaching someone in that sort of position.  Because you're never quite sure if someone has mental health issues, and -if they do- whether they could be volatile.  It would've been different if it was dark and unpopulated -- it would've been necessary to prioritise our own safety more heavily if that were the case, but this was broad daylight with plenty of folk around & businesses open.

    I myself am not the tidiest looking person, I've hair like a bird nest and my old worn-out hippy clothes have been around the block a long time in some cases.  If I fall down and hit my head, I'd like to think someone wouldn't be too scared of my appearance to offer help, or at least make a phone call to summon it.

    Someone said to me in a virtual conversation (paraphrased): I like to protect the weak, because sometimes that's me.

    Just something to think about.

Cookies/data

European Union laws require that EU visitors be given information about cookies used and data collected on this blog.  Google/Blogger have added a notice on this blog to explain Google's use of certain Blogger and Google cookies, including use of Google Analytics and AdSense cookies, and other data collected by Google.  If this notice does not display and you are in the EU, please will you notify me in the comments section.  Many thanks. 

Inclusivity, diversity, equality etc - some thoughts

    I'm certain this has all been said before and by much more articulate folk than me.  But it'd been on my mind somewhat lately, so I thought it might make for a blog post.  [I actually began writing this some time ago, but never posted it at the time for some reason.  Given recent events in the US it now seems insanely inadequate.  But I'm going to post it anyway.]

Privilege
    When someone says: "When's straight-white-cis-male history month, hmm?" it's rather like a middle-class kid saying "there's a mothers' day and a fathers' day, and even a grandparent's day; so when's kids' day?"
    To which I'd say:  In most middle-class communities, every day is kid's day.

    Privilege can be a bit insidious.  The privileged don't always intend to be so thoughtless, though; sometimes it's just a lack of exposure making empathy more distant.  But that doesn't mean that thoughtlessness should just be accepted.  Far from it; in fact this is kind of the point, here.

    An example.  My spouse isn't a bad dude by any means, but he sometimes just needs a little reminding.  Recently, he was complaining about characters in e.g. rebooted fiction shows being changed from straight to lesbian, or whatever.
    And I pointed out that it's about representation.  So, then he started to say, "but what about the rest of us?"
    I shut that shit down (before he'd finished the thought, honestly), with: "You don't need visibility, my love; you've had it throughout all of history!"  He conceded.
    (He's a straight white cis guy, if you didn't already figure that out.  The only privileged thing he's not is middle-class, as we're a working class family.  And it's more or less the same for me, as I'm a cis white woman.  But I feel I get it more because I'm bi and pagan and I consider myself to be both disabled and neurodiverse.)

    Cameron Esposito, comedian and author, said on episode 227 of the Morbid true crime podcast:-

    "When the straight cis white dude is like: 'cancel culture is coming for me', it's like: no, some of the stuff that's been hurting you is that other people now want space.  And you feel hurt that, like, a trans woman wants to be seen as a woman.  That hurts you because you've had 100% of the power and now you feel threatened.  You're betraying showing yourself.  The cancel culture ... you're just receiving feedback that people think you actually still have more power than this person."  [Emphasis mine.]

Black Lives Matter
    I don't know who to attribute the point to, unfortunately, but someone said the following. To paraphrase: responding to the phrase Black Lives Matter with "all lives matter" is rather like standing up at someone else's birthday party and making noise about how you have a birthday too.
    (I think I heard somewhere that the slogan was originally intended to be Black Lives Matter Too but there was a character limit.  I think it's more powerful as it is.  I don't even know how to speak about the fact that a variation of the phrase has been co-opted by opposing ideologies, so I will recognise my own limitations, here.)

Slow going, becoming woke
    I was attending a theatre the other month named The Mayflower.  And I overheard a woman seated near me talking about how it was named after the pilgrims who voyaged to America.  She said: "I don't know if that's the best thing, to name it after a bunch of people who went over there and, you know, mistreated them and stuff."
    Maybe I'm being overly critical (or even a bit 'woker-than-thou'), but it felt like something a person might say to try and impress someone else.
    And I thought: I bet you don't even know that Britain was still in very recent history paying funds in respect of compensation to former slave owners*!  And that the descendants of the slaves themselves received and still receive jack shit (other than the fear of discrimination, and even shittier outcomes of racism).
    (Okay, I only know this from a Black History month talk I attended in my lunch hour at work a year or so ago.  But I feel like that's a very significant thing that the public ought to know and yet it's been kept very hushed!)

Some progress is better than no progress?
    I guess the fact that that white woman had that thought (even if only to try and impress her date), it's still better than just never considering other communities' experiences at all.  There would've been a time -in the not too distant past- when that thought wouldn't even have entered most white womens' minds (my own included, if I'm completely honest).

Backsliding, though
    Within my lifetime it previously felt as though we'd made progress in the realms of inclusion and diversity.  And we had.  But news coming from the US in particular ever since Trump's first presidency, and more so during his current one, highlights backsliding in the worst way.
    One of my favourite artists, P!nk, back in 2006 had something to say which I really respect.  I still frequently have to remind myself that Dear Mr President was written about a whole different president.  Then again, I still sometimes have to remind myself that Trump as US president was not just a Simpsons gag, but actually a reality!  A distressing, dystopian, nightmare reality.
    Between Trump administrations, I'd wanted to hope that things would improve again under Biden & etc.  But then there was the overturning of Roe v. Wade, which was very discouraging to say the least.  It worries me that the UK sometimes seems to follow in the footsteps of the US.  And it fill me with dread that the Reform party seems to be gaining such ground over here (**).

Solidarity
    In trying to find a more positive way to wrap up this post, I almost subtitled this paragraph Fight the Good Fight.  But then I searched the phase and discovered it came from the bible/a Christian hymn.  So I didn't want to promote those connotations here.
    Instead, at the risk of coming across a little bit Monty Python, I'm going for: solidarity.
    And actually, since Monty Python brought us some truths within the comedy: "Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses."  There's a joke there about being oppressed, but that feels like inappropriate timing.  Maybe it's better just to give a whistle for now.

    Finally (and less cheerfully, again), ableism is going to feature in another forthcoming blog post.  As I've been on the receiving end of it recently, and I did not like it one bit.  I think I might be ready to stand up and (ugh) be counted as a visible disabled person (albeit with non-visible disabilities!).

    PS if this comes off as virtue signalling, I really hope no-one will take any significant offense -- if even one person explores the links etc below and educates themselves a bit more on the issues, I'll consider that this post has achieved something worthwhile. 

Resources and causes to consider supporting:-

~ Search: Accidental Courtesy documentary, and Daryl Davis, online
~ Action for Race Equality
~ The Black Curriculum
~ Black Lives Matter UK
~ Blueprint for All (formerly the Stephen Lawrence Trust)
~ Guardian article: The year of Karen: how a meme changed the way Americans talked about racism | Race | The Guardian
~ Human Rights Watch | World Report 2025 (unable to find a 2026 one at the time of writing)
~ The Privilege Walk
~ Race Equality Foundation
~ The Runnymede Trust
~ Stand Up To Racism (disclaimer, though: has been accused of being a 'front' for the Socialist Workers Party, which in turn has been accused of covering up sexual violence)
~ Stephen Lawrence Day Foundation: A Legacy For Change
~ Windrush 100 -- Windrush 100 seeks to deliver the vision of a fair and equal Britain that the Windrush generation would have been proud to see
~ Book: Maybe I Don't Belong Here by David Harewood (there's also a documentary featuring David called Psychosis and Me, but doesn't cover the racism aspect of David's experience as much as the book does.)

*see https://taxjustice.net/2020/06/09/slavery-compensation-uk-questions/ and
https://www.runnymedetrust.org/publications/reparations

**take a look, if you feel the same, at: Forward Democracy.

Cookies/data
European Union laws require that EU visitors be given information about cookies used and data collected on this blog.  Google/Blogger have added a notice on this blog to explain Google's use of certain Blogger and Google cookies, including use of Google Analytics and AdSense cookies, and other data collected by Google.  If this notice does not display and you are in the EU, please will you notify me in the comments section.  Many thanks.